Bent Tree Bible Fellowship

Jesus loves the little children, All the children of the World...
Jesus loves me this I know, For the Bible tells me so...
YES He does, and so does the church!!!!
Most of you that read this blog probably don't know how much I truely love the church that I attend. I haven't always loved it - actually, when I started going there in high school, I hated it! I had my reasons, and they were very valid. I started serving in the children's ministry, and I began to hate it less. When Ryan and I started dating seriously, I stopped attending my church and began attending church with his family. I will say that the two churches are VERY different.
My mom continued attending church, alone. She found friends at this church. She found comfort and strength. And SO SO much more! And for all of that I am so very thankful!
When Ryan and I broke up (and after a few months of not getting out of bed), I began attending church again. I started serving in the children's ministry as a Zone Leader in the Toddler Hallway. I have created and rekindled friendships with people that attend this church. I have found my home - again! I have a new appreciation for the church because of the strength and support that was given to my mom and myself when I found out I was pregnant!
I also have a new support for the church because of Jackson. Since high school, I have worked in the children's ministry, and I have a very strong testimony of what the Lord does through the children's ministry. I know it is important work, and I know the staff and volunteers have a heart for the Lord's children. I know that because I am one of the volunteers. There are actually volunteers that taught MY class when I was in elementary school (at a different church) that STILL teach in the elementary program at our current church! There are volunteers that I volunteered with when I was in high school that still volunteer here. There are staff members that worked in the same classroom that Mom and I worked in when I was in high school. These volunteers amaze me every day!
There are also new staff members and volunteers - ones whom I love deeply! I love them not just for their fabulous personalities, but for so much more - heartwarming smiles, loving hugs, kind words of support and encouragement, advice, being my role models, times of fellowship, being accepting of me (regardless of where I have been in my life). I really could go on and on and on! But I love them more than I ever imagined because of their emense love for Jackson. If there is anyone (outside of family - and, yes, Aunt Jamie and Uncle Ronnie are included in 'family') that could love Jackson so much - it is these people! They really show the love that God has to me and Jackson each and every week! They pour love into Jackson until I am sure his heart is going to explode. They love on him, they hold him when my arms are going to break off, they pray for him - they genuinely care about him and his well-being! I can never thank them enough, but I sure will try!
The church has an amazing plan for partnering with parents and a terrific outlook on where they want these children to go in their relationship with the Lord!
From ages 0-2, the church wants to support parents. They know this is a difficult season of life - new parents are TIRED. The church desires to give new parents a time to be refreshed and recharged in church. They long to provide a safe environment and assure parents that their new bundles of joy are in good hands. I would even say that Jackson is in AMAZING hands while at church! This area has very low ratios of volunteers to children (1:2 - 1:4, depending on age), and ALL volunteers have background checks with the church. The church desires to keep the same kids with the same leaders/volunteers each week, and they do a GREAT job of that! These kids really do have fun at church! I will not promise you that there are never tears - there are tears. But the volunteers comfort and love on these children, and, eventually, all is well!
From ages 3-5, the church wants to encourage parents. The church staff and volunteers greet both the parents and the children. There are classes (Create A Rhythm) that help parents help their children grow spiritually. Parents are always invited into the classroom to worship and learn with the kids. The church provides "Small Talks" - a resource to take what is being taught at church and continue growing, worshiping, and teaching at home. The small ration of 1:4 continues with these children. The church first introduces Small Groups at this age. The volunteers are encouraged to (and most do) stay with the same group of kids the entire time they are in the toddler and preschool rooms. The classes go to Large Group where they sing songs, worship, and learn about Jesus.
When kids enter school, parents tend to find their time with their children becoming smaller. The church desires to equip parents during kindergarten to 5th grade. The church wants to create an environment where kids can't wait to come to church! (And this church does just that!!!) Parents love to hear volunteers brag on their children (and those volunteers love to brag on those kids). The volunteers often get involved with the families, go to sporting events, have outside activities for their small groups, and so much more! Kids are encouraged to invite their parents to learn and worship with them in class. FX Live is a family worship service betweent he two regular church services. Families are found worshiping and learning about Jesus. (There may or may not be beach balls, lights, silly string, etc at FX Live!) The church hopes that they can help parents to show their kids what they are learning can be lived out at home! In kindergarten through 2nd grade, kids are split into color groups based on preference. These groups are fluid, but since children are creatures of habit, core groups naturally form. Leaders shepherd the core group, and warmly welcome new and 'revolving' kids. In 3rd through 5th grades, groups of 8-10 kids are developed. These groups are based on age, gender, and affinity. The same kids go with the same leader each week. Kids are encouraged to bring friends, and they are welcomed into the same group. Groups are highly intentional, designed to build community and encourage spiritual growth. Each grade level will have a male and a female leader that will receive unconnected kids each week. These groups are highly relational, designed to welcome and engage new or irregularly attending children. The desire of the church is to have children begging their parents to come to church - causing them to never miss a week of church! (While the church knows this is unlikely to happen, the goal is to create a love of coming to learn about and worship Jesus.)
Once kids (now called students) enter middle school, the church longs to engage parents. Leaders are encouraged to share the cool, neat, and exciting things they are seeing in and experiencing with the students. Communication is key at this age! Parents are encouraged to talk to and engage with their students. The students are in groups of 8-10 with two designated leaders. There is a large group/small group format, meaning students will learn and worship in large groups and grow, share, and develop in small groups.
High school is a crazy time for parents, and the church knows that kids are rarely around their parents. This is the reason behind their goal to stand in for parents. Leaders connect with parents and tell them what they see in their students. Students are connected to another adult that will say the same things as their parents. Students are kept accountable and are encouraged to talk to their parents. The same groups of 8-10 students are kept during high school, often with the same leaders. Large group teaching time is offered on Sunday nights, and small groups meet often. All small groups meet on Sunday evening, but many groups also meet during the week as well.
I know that middle school and high school seem so far away for Jackson (even kindergarten seems distant), but it gives me comfort and assurance that the church has the end in mind when thinking about Jackson's relationship with God. The thought and prayer that the leaders of the church pour into developing these young hearts warms mine. My heart swells when I think about them - the leaders and children!

Day Fourty Four...

Today was a very big day for two very important people! April and Kevin were married today in a BEAUTIFUL ceremony in Houston, TX. They are such a sweet couple. I am so lucky to have them in my life! Congratulations, Kevin and April! We love you!

At the end of the night, I had to track down April! This was the first time she had met Jackson, and I had to get a picture of them together. (Jackson was interested in the lights and the music, so it was a bit difficult to get him to look at the camera.)

Isn't April stunning?? Her dress was perfect - it was so her! The ceremony was so beautiful - made me cry! The reception was so much fun! What a great day!

We also had to get a picture with Ashleigh. Ashleigh was a bridesmaid - and looked great! Jackson was so ready to go home at this point. He was so sleepy and tired of being in dress up clothes! But he was so cute, and everyone had to hold him!

This picture is from the road trip down to Houston. The wedding was the same day as the Texas/OU game in Dallas. Jamie and I had to wear our Texas shirts proudly as we passed by the Cotton Bowl. We stopped at McDonalds for lunch, and to get Jackson out of the carseat for a while. As we ate, I fed Jackson. I burped him, and of course he spit up. This time it ran down my back. I thought I had it all cleaned off, but as we were about to leave, I realized that it had puddled on the back cushion of the bench. My back was soaked!

Good thing I love this kid!!!

Day Fourty Three...

How sweet is this baby face! Jackson loves to be naked! I am not brave enough to let him be naked, so he spends some of his time in a diaper. At night, before Jackson goes to bed, I lay him on my legs and we play! Sometimes we sing songs, other times we stretch or exercise. It is great Mommy-Jackson time! Sometimes when I am busy doing something (laundry, washing bottles, etc.) Gigi gets to play! This is the sweetest time of night with the sweetest boy on the planet!
Jackson is getting really good at holding his head up - well, for a little while. He is also getting better at making eye contact. He won't stare at you forever, but everyday his gaze holds a little longer than the day before! It is so amazing to watch him every day as he grows and changes!
He definitely looks more like a baby than a little infant now. He is bulking up, getting little 'love rolls', and cooing like a baby!
Look at this belly!!! I love it!

Sometimes Jackson makes the funniest faces! He really does bring a smile to my face every second of the day!

Day Fourty Two...

Sometimes Jackson does the weirdest things! He loves his swing, so he often spends lots of time in it during the day. But when he heards loud noises or gets startled, he throws his hands up in the air. They slowly fall back into a comfortable place for him.
I love this boy SO much!

Day Fourty One...

"Who are these Phillies these people keep talking about? Gigi won't stop talking about them..."
"Baseball? I guess I like baseball! The Phillies must be pretty good - Gigi says they are in the playoffs! Go Phillies!!!" "Wait... They are going to play the Rangers? Oh... I can't cheer for the Phillies!"

"Well then... I guess I'll just lay here and look cute!"

Grammy sent Jackson a Phillies onesie! I do have to say it is pretty perfect! It still fit him - it wasn't snug at all! I love the shamrocks on the onesie! Too cute!

Thanks, Grammy!

Day Thirty Nine...

Tonight before I started feeding Jackson, we had some time to play. Normally, he is screaming his head off when he wakes up. I quickly change him (which clams him momentarily). Then he is ready to eat. But not tonight! I changed him, and he was completely calm and completely awake! We talked to each other, danced, sang songs, and just played! It made me think about how much I cannot wait until he is old enough to play back. I can't wait to hear his little voice. I can't wait to hear his laugh. I can't wait until he belly laughs. I can't wait for him to know what he is laughing at. I can't wait for him to run up to me and give me a big hug - just because I am his mommy. I just can't wait...

Well... Maybe I can wait! I just want to savor these moments right now! I feel like thirty nine days has gone by so quickly. I feel like he will be one year old tomorrow and in kindergarten the next day. I just don't want to blink and miss anything.

He is really starting to have a little personality. He will look into my eyes, and we will stare at each other for a few moments. He will hold his head up for a minute or more. His eyes will be open really wide. He just looks at everything. He will rest his head on my shoulder, facing me, and look right at me. Sometimes when he does this we smile at each other. He will find his cozy spot on my chest, curled up in a little ball (similar to a rollie polie), and take a deep, relaxing breath. He will coo and oooh and aaah at anything and everything.

He has such a tight grip on my heart - and he won't let go! Which is totally fine with me... He is right where he should be!

After I fed him tonight, he was ready to go back to sleep. I know that if he doesn't burp before I lay him down, he is miserable, doesn't sleep well, and has a tummy ache when he wakes up! So I knew I had to get a good burp out of him...
While I was trying to burp him, he gave us a good shot of 'milk drunk'. I think that he looks like he is drunk (on milk) after he eats. Sometimes there is a little river of milk that flows from his relaxed mouth.
I love looking at him... Sometimes it is the simplest things that steal my heart! I love this boy!

Day Thirty Seven...

Gigi bought Jackson a really neat toy! He lays under it and there are a bunch of buttons and handles for him to push, pull, tug, hit, turn, etc. Each one makes a different noise, and lights blink all over the place! He loves to look at it! Tonight we played under it for about 30 minutes. He needs a little bit of help pushing the buttons, but he loves to hit the handles that hang down. After he hits one of the handles, he waves his hands in the air and looks around. It is almost like he wants to see if everyone saw (and noticed) that he made the toy play music. (I don't know where he gets the need to seek attention... lol!)
This little boy is so happy and thankful to have his Gigi in his life... He even told me so tonight!

Day Thirty Six...

Today was the opening day of The State Fair of Texas! And it was Jackson's first trip to the State Fair! And it was Aunt Lauren's first trip to the State Fair!
We did a lot of walking around (both inside and out)! I definitely burned some of that baby weight today...
I decided that every year, we would go to the State Fair. Every year Jackson and I will take a picture next to Big Tex! Big Tex is about a million feet tall - so Jackson will always look like my little boy (at least next to Big Tex)!
We really wish that Griffen and Delaney would have been able to come to Texas on this trip, but maybe in a few years! They would have LOVED the State Fair! And I am sure they would LOVE LOVE LOVE Baby Jackson!

Day Thirty Five...

Cousin Griffen had a birthday on September 1st! It was a tie-dye party, and they made Jackson a tie-dye onesie! It is super cute! Aunt Lauren can't believe how little he is, but I still can't get over how big he is!
Look at this sweet face... Don't you just want to eat him all up?

Day Thirty Four...

We are on our way to go meet Aunt Lauren. She came into town tonight while we were at work. Gigi picked her up, and we are going to meet for dinner! She will be here until October 1st, and we have some big plans while she is here! Most of them include Aunt Lauren loving on Baby J!
Aunt Lauren is having twins soon (March/April), and she needs to brush up her newborn baby skills. It has been a few years since she had a baby this little at home, so she wants to practice. She even offered to sleep in the room with Jackson and get up with him in the middle of the night, so Momma can get some rest! We will see if that lasts past the first night she is here...

Day Thirty Three...

This is probably the world's worst picture... But I love it! Jackson and Gigi were talking about something - and aparently it was really funny! If you look really close, you can see Jackson's blury little face smiling and giggling! He loves his Gigi!

This is a much better picture (but I still think the first one is so precious!)! Jackson loves to talk to his Gigi - they have some of their best talks at night! Gigi can't wait to see Baby J when we get home from work! She spends all day at work, and then we are at work until after it is dark outside! When we get home, she is more than happy to change diapers, feed him, bathe him - ANYTHING to do with Jackson. (I, on the other hand, am starting to feel like chopped liver!)

I am so glad Jackson has such a special place in Gigi's heart! She loves him so...

Day Thirty Two... One Month...

So, we tried to take some really cute pictures of Jackson today because he is
ONE MONTH OLD!!!!
It didn't really work! I bought these really cute stickers to put on onesies or t-shirts, but Jackson was not a fan! Even if this picture was cute, I would have retaken it because the blanket is in it!

Gigi tried to comfort and calm him while Momma tried to quickly snap a picture of a pleasant Jackson... Still he wanted nothing to do with this photo shoot!

This one isn't too bad! I love that his arms and legs are stretched out, so you can really start to see how big he is! I thought we could be done with that sticker...

But there was another sticker! (There were two packs of stickers that I thought were super cute... I couldn't decide which one I liked better, so I bought both of them!)

We tried the WubbaNub to see if he would be happy after that... But of course I took a picture of Jackson looking away from the camera, and with the WubbaNub in his mouth...

Still with the WubbaNub in his mouth... He really does love that thing... And it is so hard to lose... Which is great!
We finally thought he was calmed down... So, Gigi took the WubbaNub out of his mouth, and I immediately snapped the picture... And this is what we get...

I was done... Jackson was done... So we called it a night!

Happy One Month Birthday Baby J! Momma loves you so much more than she ever thought was possible! You are such a delight to have in my life (even when you are screaming and not cooperating when I want to take a million pictures)! I am so lucky that I get to have you every day for the rest of my life! Love you bunches! ~<3~ Momma

Day Thirty One...

Today, something changed...
I looked at my tiny baby boy, but he did not look so tiny anymore! I put him in a footed sleeper for pajamas tonight... Something about that outfit made Jackson look really big! I guess it is a reality that I need to get used to, but I just wasn't ready for that yet!
I may or may not have shed a tear or two...
How sweet is this sleepy head? I love him to the ends of the Earth...

Day Thirty...

Jackson is getting ready for Halloween a little early this year...
After I fed him a bottle this afternoon, I picked him up, burped him, and he fell asleep! This is not abnormal...) I took him into my room to lay him down in his bassinet so he could lay down and stretch out a little. When I picked him up and put him on my shoulder, his little arms stuck straight out!
Mummy loves this little Zombie!
(Cheesy... I know... But I couldn't resist!)
By the way... I hate that I look like I haven't showered in most of these pictures! I promise that I do shower! I guess when you spend the whole day with a baby who doesn't care if your hair is straightened or your make up is done... I don't care either! But I wish I did...

Day Twenty Eight...

Look at this sweet angel face... (Sorry the picture is a little blurry)
I have this internal struggle...
I went back to work this week (more about that later), and I get home pretty late each night! The great thing about my job is that I get to take Jackson with me, and keep him with me all day. The drive home puts Jackson to sleep - EVERY TIME! So when we get home, he is still asleep. Most times he is in a deep sleep - one that I don't want to wake him from...
That is precisely the problem... He is asleep in his carseat and I don't want to wake him up!
I feel terrible for letting him sleep for a few hours in his carseat, but I know that if I wake him up when we get home his sleep schedule for ethe whole night will be thrown off!
What to do, what to do...

Day Twenty Seven...

Aunt Jamie brough over a sling today for us to use! After studying the directions, I put it on and we stuffed Jackson in it! I was really nervous, but he seemed to love it! He looked like a little nugget! It seemed to be a tight fit when we were getting him in, but once he was in he fit perfectly! He was snug, but not too tight! I was a little hesitant to take my hands off the bottom of the sling, but after a few minutes I realized that I did not need to support the sling. It is great... I can still hold him so close to me, but have my hands free! I still find myself rubbing his bottom and back - just like I did when I was pregnant! I love having his so close, and I think Jackson is pretty fond of it as well!

Day Twenty Six...

Clearly, I spoke too soon!
Tonight at bath time, Jackson screamed the whole time! From the moment I set him in the tub to the second I took him out! Maybe the water was too warm... Maybe the water was too cold... Maybe Jackson could sense my nerves... Whatever it was, he DID NOT like it one bit!
However, when I took him out, he was the sweetest baby ever! I wrapped him up in his choo-choo towel and cuddled with him for a while! If I wasn't so afraid that he was going to pee or poo all over his clean self, I would have cuddled with him like that for hours! (Who am I kidding... I didn't want him to pee or poo on me either!)
Bath for Jackson... Check!
Bath for Mommy... Not So Much!

Day Twenty Five...

Boy, does Jackson love bath time... Today was Jackson's first 'in water' bath! And he LOVED it! I have been so afraid to give him a real bath (although we were cleared to do so several days ago) when I am home by myself! There is something about soap and water that just makes a little baby SO very slippery! Gigi gave Jackson his bath today, and he was perfect! He cooed and aaahed! There was no crying - even when she washed his face! He did pee in the water - no surprise! But he did great! I hope he loves bath times!

Day Twenty Four...

Jackson loves to sleep in his bassinet... Jackson loves to sleep in his swing... BUT sometimes Jackson just needs a chance to stretch out! He REALLY LOVES to sleep on the couch! We lay him down on his back, but tonight he turned toward the couch! He curled that leg up under him (maybe to keep him on his side). He pulled his arms up in front of his face. I was a little worried that he would suffocate himself, but he was doing great! The weird thing is - When I don't feel well or when I am really tired, I like to sleep on the couch - facing the couch! Such a sweet naptime this evening!

Day Twenty Three...

Let me tell you... This boy LOVES to squirm! His favorite time to squirm is while his diaper is being changed. He has started to roll onto his side while we change his diaper. I think he would probably roll all the way over, but he just cannot figure out what to do with that arm! I bet it won't be too far down the road that he will be rolling onto his belly!

Day Twenty Two...

Jackson has started doing tummy time at home! And, surprisingly, he seems to like it. I would not say he loves it, but he enjoys spending time on his tummy. He does well - he holds his head up, turns his head from side to side, and presses his chin out. I am always right beside him while he does tummy time. I pick him up when he gets frustrated. We try to do tummy time once a day, but sometimes we do it more! I can't believe that soon Jackson will push up on his arms...

Day Twenty One...

Last night was not too bad... Once Jackson fell aslepp, he did his normal 4 hour stretches! I am noticing that Jackson is awake more and more during the day. Right after his feedings, I will burp him. After he burps really good a few times, he is ready to stay up for about 45 minutes. I love these times - he coos and he is playful. Sometimes he just cuddles. He will rest on your shoulder, and he is starting to lift his head on his own. His eyes are so bright and wide open. He looks all around - and especially at lights! He will look at me, but I am not quite sure that he knows he is looking at me.
I thought I love him when he was born, but I fall more and more in love with him each and every day!

Day Twenty...

So... Like I said earlier... This is about the time we put Jackson to bed (between 10 and 10:30pm)... NOT TONIGHT! This boy is wide awake! He thinks it is time to party. We have tried changing him, feeding him, rocking him. We have tried the swing, the pacifier, and walking around. He isn't crying - he just does not want to go to sleep! Oh well... It might be a long night!

Day Nineteen...

I could seriously look at this face for hours! He is so perfect! His skin is so soft and so smooth! His lips are perfectly pursed. His tongue rests silently between his lips. His short, quick breaths are a welcomed sound.
This is about the time I put Jackson down for the night. He is getting better at sleeping, but he doesn't sleep through the night yet. He gives me a good 4 hour stretch each night - so he is doing pretty good. I really thought that I would hate getting up with him in the middle of the night, like it would be a hassle. However, it is the complete opposite. I love it! Sometimes I wake up before he does. I listen to him breathe, grunt, and squirm. I change him, feed him, and rock him. I hold him until he is asleep, and some nights I think about holding him while he sleeps for the rest of the night. But then I remember that I cannot hold him all the time. Plus, if I held him all night, who would take care of him when I needed to sleep?
We both had doctors appointments today - I will update about those later!

Day Eighteen...

Like I said before, Jackson loves to sleep in his swing! When he doesn't look like he is deep in thought, he has his hands up. It is one of the funniest things he does. He will be sleeping with his hands down (by his side, on his belly, on his chest) and all of the sudden he will get startled. His hands will shoot up into the air - with his fingers spread as wide as they will go! Slowly - really slowly - they will float back down. Sometimes his hands will be in the air for almost 5 minutes before they go all the way back down. Through all of this he never wakes up! He is such a cute boy!

Day Seventeen...

Today was Jackson's first trip to church! He did, well, as good as can be expected of a newborn. We did not make it to the 9am service, but we made it to church around 10:15am. We hung out in the Crossing (the lobby at church) and so many friends came to get their first glimpse at Baby J! Everyone ooohed and aaaahed at him. They said he was beautiful, perfect, and absolutely adorable. We would get squeals of glee from friends when they would see us across the Crossing. They would leave their own children behind and run over to see us. Everyone was very careful - no one touched him unless I allowed them. Even strangers commented about how sweet he was! He wore brown pants (we had to roll them a few times to make them fit his skinny little waist - so they really looked like shorts) and a striped long sleeved shirt. On the front of the shirt, it said "Born in '11".
We went in to the sanctuary when church was close to starting. We got in our normal seats, except I sat on the outside because I may have had to make a quick escape with a screaming baby. We made it through music - I was a little worried that the loud music would hurt his ears, but Gigi said he would be okay! He actually slept through all of the music, but, as things got quiet and the pastor began to talk, Jackson woke up and started to get fussy. I took him out before he let out a big wail.
We went into the nursing mothers room, where there is a screen showing the service. There were a few other mothers in there with their little ones. I looked like a complete newbie. I must have apologized to those ladies a million times. We all started talking, and they gave some great advice - things I will have to try for next week! They were great, and completely accepting and forgiving!
After church was over, we met Gigi in the Crossing. Of course, more people came and ooohed and aaahed over Baby J. We went out to lunch with some church friends, and Jackson did great (until he was ready to go)!
He has had an eventful day so far. We are home to take a nap, but we might need to run to Target later this afternoon! We will see - Jackson is now the boss around here!

Day Sixteen...

Gigi dressed Jackson today! She loves this little onesie - she thinks it is just perfect! We often describe Jackson as a little tree frog. Whenever you pick him up to take him anywhere or you hold him close against your chest, he will pull his legs up. He pulls them up so high that they are even with his cute little butt. He looks just like a little tree frog. He perches on your arm, gets comfortable, and will sleep for hours!
I also happen to love this little smile! I know, it is porbably just gas pains. But that is the cutest smile on the planet! Maybe he is dreaming happy thoughts...

Day Fifteen...

Jackson is TWO WEEKS new today... I cannot believe how times flies!
Jackson loves to swing... When he swings, he always falls asleep... And when he sleeps he often looks like he is deep in thought! It is so cute! He will scrunch his forehead up and make those cute little wrinkles. He sometimes will pull his hand to his head - sometimes at his ear, sometimes covering his eye, and sometimes carefully placed on his forehead. It is almost as if he is saying "Oh no, What is wrong with this world?!" Sometimes he looks like a little old man when he is sleeping and in such deep thought. I often wonder what he is thinking about - it must be something very important!